Greetings all! (She says optimisticly…)
As an introductory post, I feel the need to talk a little about myself and what I want to do with this blog.
I am an ecclectic pagan who has been practicing on and off (more on that later) for nearly 25 years. Through the years I’ve practiced solitary NeoWicca, hedge witchcraft, and ADF style Druidry. It was because of the ADF Dedicant program, part of which includes finding a hearth culture and a patron deity, that I finally found a real spiritual home worshipping the Greek pantheon.
I am a follower of Dionysos above all, and have an intense interest in Hermes, my husband’s patron. I think of them as our “household” gods, but attempt to give due honor and respect to all the Theoi.
I eventually left the ADF. While I love its combined emphasis on scholarship and practice, it has a definite Celtic flavor, despite its attempts at Pan-IndoEuropean inclusiveness. This framework did not feel like a good fit for worshipping Hellenic gods. I still have a lot of respect for the organization and use much of what I learned from them in my own practice.
(I have also recently felt pulled towards certain Buddhist philosophies and even aspects of liberal Christianity – although I’ve put these interests somewhat on the back burner for now as I piece my primary path back together.)
So now I’m somewhere in the mists, trying to find my way once again. At least this time I have guides.
I’ve looked at Hellenic Reconstructionism, as I have many online contacts who practice this faith and it looked like an obvious alternative. I want to worship my gods in the way that they have chosen, yet it seems impossible to recreate a municpal religion with only two worshippers. I also don’t feel qualified to offer the blood sacrifice that was such an important part of ancient practice. I’m not particularly squeamish about animal sacrifice – at least, I could get over any squeamishness I do have: I am an omnivore and hate hypocrisy – but I don’t have the skills or the facilities to do it properly.
I will probably never be a Recon, but I am beginning to research ancient Greek household practices and the Mystery cults, and let the gods guide me where they will.
On a personal level, I suffer from major depression and have all my life. Spiritually, this means I will often go for long periods where I completely neglect my practice and, while the gods are always in my mind, I never seem to turn to them in these times of greatest need. This is what has happened to me recently. I’m just starting to climb out of the worst depression of my life, during which I moved from Phoenix back home to California. I only recently realized that, while I have dutifully unpacked Dionysos’ shrine and am keeping it pristine, I haven’t made an offering to him since I left Arizona in December. One of my major goals, as I start to regain energy and interest in life is to reaffirm my faith and attempt to repair my relationship with the gods.
That’s where this blog comes in. I’ve attempted to keep spiritual blogs in the past, both as part of the ADF Dedicant program and on my own, but I’ve never been able to keep at it for long. I’m using the Pagan Blog Project as a framework to encourage me to post more regularly this time. Many posts will deal with personal discoveries and insights, though I will try to keep them useful or interesting to any followers that happen to come along. I also intend to post more scholarly essays as I get the braincells firing again and am able to do proper research.
That’s all for now. Blessed be. Namaste. Peace, love and soy products… and all that jazz.